Edward & Me

A very human emotion is to understand where we come from, what made us. Clearly people from all times and races have thought much about their ancestors. I often think that one of the hardest things about being adopted would be a lack of even the most basic knowledge of such things. Knowing something of your past is evidenced by the universal fascination with family history, both your own and other peoples so I don't think I'm an orphan in wondering about my ancestors' actions, thoughts and emotions.

I feel fortunate that Edward's life is quite extensively documented in both his Diary and Squatter's Castle. Reading those works I constantly put myself in his place and wonder how I would have reacted to the world he lived in. I feel an empathy with him that I don't feel with other historical figures. I feel that I'm part of him and he is part of me.

Ego-centric I know because Edward by now has a vast number of descendants, all perhaps very different people but are we. Is there something that connects us all through Edward?

For example Edward was a member of the NSW colonial parliament and clearly a man who wished to see his views hold sway in society. He was dynastic in the way he built his "castle" and then attempted through his will to see it and it's associated "estate", passed on via a form of primogeniture to descendants who continued the name of Ogilvie even through a maternal line. I suspect Edward would be vastly proud of the fact that his descendants include a Deputy Prime Minister, a Supreme Court Judge and other movers and shakers such as politicians and social leaders. So is that for instance a trait that Edward has passed on?

While that is not a characteristic I possess strongly enough to see me in that sort of position, I think that what I do share with Edward is a curiosity about the world that makes me constantly day dream about seeing parts other than home. However, like Edward I'm torn between wanting to see the world but  with a love of the familiar and home. Listen to his thoughts as he turns to view his home from the last vantage point as he commences his journey; 
I turned away with a sad heart, for although this voyage to Europe had for years been the dearest object of my wishes,  and constant theme of my day-dreams ; yet, now that the long-wished-for moment had arrived, I felt reluctant to leave a spot associated with so many remembrances of
successful enterprise and requited toil, endeared too by crowding recollections of joy
and sadness, happiness and sorrow,
I couldn't describe better the emotion I feel every time I set out on a journey from home.